Why Do Kids Bully?
Understanding how and why a bully uses aggressive behavior is key to knowing how to handle the situation.
A common reason that a kid is a bully is because he/she lacks attention from a parent at home and lashes out at others for attention. This can include neglected children, children of divorced parents, or children with parents under the regular influence of drugs/alcohol. In fact, bullying and Divorced Parents have a very strong connection.
Older siblings can also be the cause of the problem. If they’ve been bullied, they are more apt to bully a younger sibling to feel more secure or empower themselves.
And we cannot rule out the fact that an adult role model is a bully. This can include parents, teachers, coaches, etc. Very often parents are bullies, are angry, or don’t handle conflict well.
Kids usually bully because they learn this behavior at home. Bullying and Divorced Parents is often the problem. Kids don’t know how to deal with certain feelings or might even feel like they can’t talk to anyone at home so they end up acting out to fill a void.
Bullying is learned behavior which can be unlearned. Some kids are just more aggressive, dominating and impulsive by nature. It doesn’t always mean that they are bullies.
Bullies dominate, blame and use others. They lack empathy and foresight and have contempt for the weak. They see weaker kids as their target., and don’t accept the consequences of their actions. They crave power and attention.
- Bullied bullies get relief from feeling helpless and overpower others
- Social bullies have poor self-esteem and manipulate others through gossip and being mean
- Detached bullies plan their attacks and always likeable to everyone but their victims
- Hyperactive bullies don’t understand how to socialize and acts inappropriately and sometimes physically.
Most bullies don’t understand how wrong their behavior is and how it makes the person being bullied feel. No matter what kind of bully someone is, they have not learned kindness, compassion and respect.